Good morning, good afternoon, or good evening…depending on when you are reading this.

As I write this post I am sitting on the train commuting into work Do you ever look at all the faces around you and wonder at the many stories to be told.

Anyway I am getting sidetracked. Today we are going to take a brief look into the next ingredient of the secret sauce to graduating college. Putting Family & Friends First.

At the heart of this step is the skill to both prioritize and set boundaries. It is an understanding of what and who is most important in your life.

I was always amazed that every student who was truly successful at college, almost to a T, said that putting their family and friends first is what gave them the strength to accomplish the difficult task of graduating college.

So the question is how do you do this? How do you both spend time with your family or friends and set clear boundaries so you have time and space to focus on school.

There are 3 essential steps. Communicate your Desire to do well in College, Schedule Time with Family and Friends, and Share your Schedule with Them.

1] Clearly communicating your desire to do well in college and to graduate will accomplish two things. One is it will build a support system around you. There will be times when you want to quit school. It is in these times that you often need someone to push or pull you through the challenge. Why not have it be a close friend or family member. Or both…By communicating your desire they will be on your side and support you when times get tough. They will also, and the is the second thing, is have a knowledge and a better understanding of why you are spending less time with them. This understanding will help ease some of the frustration that may arise due to your new commitment.

2] Spend time with your friends or family. This seems like a no brainer but it is actually something that you have to do deliberately. Schedule this time in and don’t break your word. This will build trust that while you are spending less time with them they are still the most important part of your life. This might mean you will be up until 1 in the morning doing homework, but a college degree is not worth alienating the people that are closest to you. And yes you can have both. This is one case you can have your cake and eat it too.

3] Share your schedule with them. This way they know when you will be in class and when you will be studying. Most people will respect this as long as they know there are other times available to spend with you.

That is it in a nut shell. Don’t stop cultivating the relationship of those around you just because you are in school. In the end your accomplishment will be as much about you as it is about the support you received from your family and friends.

Tuesday I am going to be back with the next ingredient in the Secret Sauce to Graduating College. Till then check out this interesting web site that I stumbled across.  It is called My College Puzzle. I need to investigate it a little further but one of the pages had some fascinating facts on college. Like this fact: More than 40% of college students are over the age of 23.  I was 28 when I finally got my BA so I was most definitly part of that stat.

Ok till Tuesday. Stay True!

Welcome back! Or welcome for the first time if this is your first visit to Success Unexpected. We are glad you dropped by.

The phrase Success Unexpected comes from Thoreaus’ quote:

I love a good quote. If you do too and if you are a college student, know a college student, or have a child in college you should most definitely check out this web site.

Avenue to Success Quotes sends daily inspirational, thought provoking, or motivational quotes “specifically selected to help keep [college students] focused on achieving their goals in life”. Chosen with great care the quotes are a great source of inspiration. And as you might know from reading this blog only about 50% of college students graduate. So inspiration is needed by the bucket full.

The service does come with a price tag. But the wonderful thing is a “majority of the subscription costs go directly to the school”. You can even nominate your Alma Mater to receive a donation. I love this idea. Tom Huchko provides a service that both inspires college students and gives financial support to some of our most cherished institutions. So if you love education and want to support not only college students but colleges themselves then make sure to visit Avenue to Success Quotes.

p.s. I  have no affiliation with Avenue Success Quotes or its owner.

The Spring Break Plan to College Graduation

Let’s quickly review what the most successful college students suggest as their 5 keys to graduation.

1] Identifying Yourself as a College Graduate

2] Friends and Family First

3] Power of Prioritization

4] Create a Schedule

5] Willing Work Ethic

In this installment of the Secret Sauce to Graduating College we are going to take an in-depth look at creating your personal identity as a college graduate.

I am sorry I have to be the one to break it to you but college is hard! There is no doubt about it. I have worked with several thousand college students and can say with great confidence, each them, at least once, usually more, thought seriously of quitting college altogether. Sadly about 50% of them did so. This is right in line with the national graduation rate according to researchers at the Council for Aid to Education. I am sure 50% of students don’t start college thinking, “What am I going to study? Shoot it doesn’t matter. I plan on dropping out anyway.”

The most important attribute those who graduate college cultivate is the attribute of seeing themselves as graduates before they even start. They have thought about their graduation day, have projected themselves forward to that event, and do not see themselves as anything but a person who has a college degree. In fact, the students who get this vision of themselves most clearly in their minds eye are the ones who have the most enjoyable and rewarding collegiate experience.

Ok, so what does any of this have to do with the title of this post? I can hear you thinking,”I thought he was going to recommend some hot new spring break destination”. That is a topic for another day but I can give you a brief glimpse…Guaymas, Mexico.

Now onto planning for Spring Break and how that can help you be one of the 50% that make it all the way through graduation day.

Let’s think about Spring Break vacation for a moment. When you go on vacation what do you do first? Pack your bags? Buy your tickets? Pick out a brand new saucy attire? No. You first decide that you want to go on vacation. This then leads directly to picking a destination. For most people this is the point where they begin to envision themselves on vacation soaking up the spring break experience. Once you have this picture in your mind then the real work begins. The planning, saving, arranging, booking transportation, and finding lodging, along with trying to convince your friends to go with you…or not go with you depending on your friends.

So for example; Say I was going to go to Palau for Spring Break. Once that is decided I begin to see myself relaxing on a beach in Palau after a beautiful day of scuba diving. I actually project myself to the point where I am watching the sun turn the sky into brilliant shades of pink and orange as it begins to slip into the calm expanse of the ocean. I can almost feel the warm breeze as it blows across my face and hear the lapping of the waves on the pristine white beach. Wow! Can you envision it? That is going to be an amazing vacation. It is this vivid picture…seeing myself as a person who is enjoying the beauty of Palau…that will help me get through the difficulties of planning and saving.

Deciding on and planning for a vacation is the exact same process you need go through to create a vision strong enough in your mind to get you across the graduation goal line. Just as you start your vacation by first deciding to go on vacation, picking a destination, and seeing yourself in that place so too should you approach your collegiate career.

Decide and envision yourself as a college graduate. Don’t just think…oh it would be nice to be a graduate. You must stamp upon your soul the identity of you as a college graduate. See yourself on your graduation day. Picture the ceremony in your mind. Imagine yourself sitting there in your cap and gown. Hearing your name called out. Walking up to accept your diploma. Feel the joy that you will experience by knowing you are one of the 50% that completed a very difficult journey.

Once you have this powerful vision of yourself in your head there will be almost nothing that can stop you. Why? Simple, you have already created the reality. Oh there will still be hard times and this is when the vision will become your best friend. It will remind you of who you are – a college graduate – and what you are seeking. It will defend you against the buffetings that you will surely encounter.

Ok so here is the formula: Mental Creation + Dedication = Graduation

Or in bullet point:

• Craft your identity as someone who is a college graduate
• Envision yourself as a person who has a degree. See clearly in your mind your diploma hanging on the wall.
• Do the work. Go to class, study, and hand in your homework
• When times get hard remind yourself that for all intent and purpose you already are a college graduate.

If you do this I can promise you that your college experience will be much smoother and more fulfilling. Most importantly you will be in that shrinking group of students who can say that they are a college graduate.

Cicero, one of ancient Rome’s greatest philosophers, once said that good men are always happy. This blog is dedicated to the ideal of good. Or in another word Happiness.

I have become convinced that one cannot “choose” to be happy. Happiness rather is a bi-product of our daily actions and decisions. We are happy when we are, in the words of Cicero, good.

So what is good? Great question, I am glad I asked.

That is what we, as a community, will be exploring. Through this blog and…hopefully…over the years to come, we will learn how to discover, understand, and practice goodness in our life. We will explore and answer such questions as, “Is there such a thing as universal good”?, “How does one cultivate goodness in themselves and in others around them”?, and “How are good and happiness connected”?

I love this quote by Cicero:The human soul is divine. When it leaves the body…it has the power to take the road back to heaven; and the better and more decently it has behaved in this life, the easier the road will be.

The key, I believe is to align ourselves with the Universal Force that governs the universe. The closer we are aligned with that Force the more good our lives become. Which in turns brings happiness into our lives.

I love the way the first chapter of the Book of Genisis starts and ends. The very first verse says In the beginning God created the Heaven and the Earth. Let me repeat that…God created the HEAVEN and the EARTH. What does this mean exactly. Well it means that God created everything. EVERYTHING! There is nothing…no-thing…that we see, feel, breath, touch, hear, or taste that was not created by God. What makes this powerful is the last verse of the 1st chapter Genisis. It says And God saw everything that he had made, and, behold, it was very good.

So if God made everything…[random thought. have you ever noticed that the only difference between the word Good and God is one little O?]…that means you and I are good. And according to Cicero good men are always happy.

Our natural state is to be happy. We were born to be happy. That is who we are at our core. Amazing isn’t it?

This blog is dedicated to the creation of the Good Life. Or in the immortal words of Ren and Stimpy…Happy, happy, joy joy.

Ok, it is time to report how I did this week. A quick note on how I am going to report my progress. As you can see below I simply copied and pasted my target list from the previous entry. To the right of each item I will comment and how well or how bad I did.

So let’s get to it!

• Physical
  • Be ready to add 10lbs to my stair climb [I am ready to roll. Wish me luck]
  • Be able to do 50 pushups in a row [I did 49 tonight before my arms gave out. So close]
  • Complete the 0 bouldering route I have been working on and at least two 1 routes. Also attempt a 2. [I finished the 0 route on the first go. I was only able to complete one 1 route. And did not attempt a 2. That was a bit to ambitious]
• Fun
  • Talk to Matt about setting up dinner with his Aunt to discuss summiting Mount Hood [Done. We are going to get together in a couple of weeks]
• Emotional
  • Spend a saucy evening with my Wife [Failed. Need to make this happen this month. Sorry honey]
    
  • Post once to personal family blog [Done]
• Financial
  • Have business web site 75% of the way completed [Failed. No comment other than I did not make the time to do this.]
• Intellectual
  • Have “On the Good Life” 80% completed [I am about 75% completed. So close]
  • Have posted 2 posts to Success Unexpected [Failed]
    
  • Have posted 3 posts to Unintended Consequences [Did not happen. Unintended Consequences is a blog for me to explore my political philosophies.]
• Spiritual
  • Have read lesson prior to Saturday[Failed. But I did deliver what I thought was a strong lesson today.]

Ok so there you have it. Not so shabby but not out of this world great either. Now onto this week, but for that you will have to read my next post, which will be up tomorrow.

Good night and God Bless.

Can you believe the month of Jan is almost over? 2008 is 1/12^th completed! Like the Steve Miller Band once said ” Time keeps on slippin, slippin, slippin – into the future“. But seriously will someone please slow down this ride. It keeps picking up speed the older I get.

Realizing that the month of Jan is almost over is creating a bit of urgency in me. I do feel like I am making forward progress on my goals, but I am not sure if I am making that progress quick enough. Also, some of my goals are getting more attention than others.

While pondering the speed [or lack thereof] at which I am working toward my resolutions I began to process my process. I asked myself “Is there anything I can do to help increase the pace at which I am accomplishing my goals?

The answer to this question? A resounding WHY YES THERE IS! I realized my process is more laissez-fair or free hand. If I thought about my goals, kept them at the forefront of my mind, then they would naturally happen. No need to interfere. While technically this is true, I am accomplishing my resolutions, right now they would probably loose in a race to a lethargic sloth.

As you have discovered this post is not so much about my performance last week [for the most part it was poor though there were a few highlights such as I continued to read at a good clip] rather it is about how I am going to tighten my process.

It is simple really. Instead of taking the “take it as it comes” approach, I am going to set weekly bench marks that I would like to hit. From these bench marks will derive a set of tasks to accomplish to ensure rapid forward progress.

So for this week here are the bench marks that I would like to hit in each of the categories I established at the beginning of the year

• Physical
  • Be ready to add 10lbs to my stair climb
  • Be able to do 50 pushups in a row
  • Complete the 0 bouldering route I have been working on and at least two 1 routes. Also attempt a 2.
• Fun
  • Talk to Matt about setting up dinner with his Aunt to discuss summiting Mount Hood
• Emotional
  • Spend a saucy evening with my Wife
  • Post once to personal family blog
• Financial
  • Have business web site 75% of the way completed
• Intellectual
  • Have “On the Good Life” 80% completed
  • Have posted 2 posts to Success Unexpected
  • Have posted 3 posts to Unintended Consequences
• Spiritual
  • Have read lesson prior to Saturday

I will report back at the end of the week. Wish me luck.

So I heard about this website the other day where learning new vocabulary has tremendous benefits. Free Rice is a vocabulary game that donates 20 grains of rice for every word you guess right to those who need it most .

The rice is distributed by the United Nations World Food Program (WFP). Donating food to those who need it most is a good thing.

The game is quickly catching on. Just yesterday alone 96,471,120 grains of rice were donated.So go and play. Learn a few new words. And help your fellow brothers and sisters.

Oh by the way, I am stuck at level 40. The word avulsion tripped me up. No I am not going to tell you what it means. You will have to discover that yourself by playing a game that literally can save someones life.

I clearly remember the first day in my algebra class when I boldly/smugly asked the teacher what most of the kids in the classroom were mumbling under their breath. “Why do we have to learn this stuff? When am I ever going to use a+b=c in real life”.

Imagine my surprise when I realized that the formula applies directly to weight loss. “What? How? How does a+b=c apply to weight loss”, I can hear you asking.

First, let’s establish a base line. We need to agree that a+b does always = c. Second, we need change the letters from a, b, and c to r, i, and wl.

As you probably remember from your math class you didn’t really add a, b, ac together. The letters are a representation for numbers. The same is true for r, i, and wl. R = Reduce. I = Increase. WL = Weight Loss.

So now we have our formula r+i=wl.

As any good math professor would do let me break down each part so that in the end the formula will be clear. And as you will see, applicable in every day life.

R simply means to reduce. Specifically you need to reduce in three areas:

1. Portion size. Instead of eating 3 or 4 slices of pizza eat 2. Instead of filling your belly till it feels like it is going to bust, fill it about 80% of the way full.
2. Consumption of chocolate, sweets, and sugary treats. I don’t know about you, but I could sit down and eat 3 or 4 glazed doughnuts a night. If I was not eating doughnuts I was having a candy bar, or a cup cake, or ice cream, or…well you get the point.
3. Intake of Soda. Some would say this fits into the sweets category, but it different. It is far worse to consume your calories in the form of sugary drinks than to get your calories in pretty much every other way.

I stands for Increase. There are 2 areas that you need to increase.

1. Your daily activity. You need to get at least 30 minutes of aerobic exercise 5 times a week. If you are already getting this but want to loose more weight then double your output. Also throw in some resistance training 3 times a week.
2.  Your consumption of fruits, vegetables and whole grains. This is a great way to replace that 3 o’clock candy craving.

So there you have it. If you add r and i together you will always get wl. It is as simple as that. Just like a+b always equals c. r+i will always give you wl.

Weight loss is not rocket science. It is as simple as 8^th grade algebra. You don’t need magic pills. Nor expensive equipment. And not even a gym membership. All you need is simple and consistent dedication to the above formula.

Since I implemented this formula 3 weeks ago I have lost 5 lbs. I am ¼ of the way to my 20lbs weight loss goal.